What my burnout taught me
In a post-COVID world, I’m finding that more and more people are feeling exhausted, stressed, and generally feeling un-motivated. There are more topics on things such as “quiet quitting” and “the great resignation” — Indicators of potential burnout from the general workforce.
I never thought I would be one to experience burnout, as I’ve always just stayed busy. I was working two jobs as soon as I started my career, and didn’t stop there. I was ALWAYS doing something. Working 60+ hour weeks plus weekends, and when I wasn’t working, I was planning something — Wether it was work related, a new project, or a vacation. I was always on the go.
I started to notice hints of burnout over a year ago when I was sleeping 5 hours a night, taking on extra work, and generally over-doing it just to keep myself busy during COVID. Granted, the depressing aspect of being stuck inside my apartment in a big city didn’t help me in any way. There were pressures on all sides of my life that contributed to what finally was a full-blown burnout. I felt slow, and completely exhausted.
While I have been battling burnout (sometimes in all the wrong ways) over the last year, I can honestly say that it’s also helped me re-evaluate my life a bit more. I chose to ignore so many warning signs because I was so focused on work, but since taking a break I’ve been able to mostly recover. The downward spiral crept up on me, until I ultimately had to face it.
Below are some of the lessons that I took away from this experience.
1 — Recognising burnout and the causes.
I have always been a “doer”. Ever since I could walk, I was running. There was no stopping me. So when I started experiencing signs of burnout, I didn’t recognise them straight away. I thought that I just needed to “work harder” in order to achieve my successes. One of my biggest problems was the mindset of “if I’m already awake, I might as well work.” I wasn’t taking time for myself to rest. I was sleeping an average around 5 hours a night, wasn’t eating properly, and had constant headaches. Classic burnout symptoms, and I wasn’t listening to what my body was telling me.
I ended up talking to a psychiatrist because I couldn’t figure out what I was feeling and what was wrong with me. After two sessions, she said, “You do realise that these are classic burnout symptoms?” I thought, “Not me… Not possible.” But there it was, written in black and white in front of my face. I felt like I couldn’t stop the momentum with my life, so I pushed forward telling myself that it would get better if I just soldiered through it. It didn’t. I should have taken the time to reflect and recognise what was causing my burnout.
2 — Know the symptoms before it’s too late.
It wasn’t until I was diagnosed with burnout, and actually listened to my body fighting me every step of the way, that I realised how serious this had become. I had been running on empty for months at this point and hadn’t been stopping. The burnout was always in the back of my mind, but I wasn’t doing anything about it. My usual confidence was shattered and I was second guessing everything. What I should have done is listened to my body and the symptoms that I had telling me to slow down before it got to this point.
There were signs to my burnout — Brain fog, headaches, severe fatigue, backaches — I just chose to ignore them thinking I could “push forward”. These are the most common symptoms, and when they finally got bad enough, I knew I couldn’t ignore it anymore.
3 — Recovery isn’t straight forward.
Unfortunately, I learned that “getting over burnout” isn’t as simple as just sleeping it off. It was long-lasting, and quite frankly, exhausting. There would be days when I felt like I could conquer the world, and then there were days when I would feel so low and exhausted that I could barely put a sentence together. It was a constant struggle to find balance, and my body didn’t care if I needed to be “on top of things” or even if it was an easy day. I needed to get in better tune with my body and the stress signals it was sending me. This was extremely frustrating for me, and because I chose not to slow down, it was only taking longer to recover.
4 — Burnout forced me to take a break and re-evaluate my life.
I found that I wouldn’t fully recover until I was forced to take a break and acknowledge my burnout. It took me almost over a year to get to this point where my focus is back and my drive is up again. I learned that going straight back into a stressful work environment wasn’t something that I needed and would be counter-productive. I wasn’t going to change and get the rest that I needed by doing what I’ve always done, which was running on empty and overworking myself.
The biggest lesson I took away from this is that you have to also force yourself to change your habits and your mindset in order to make lasting changes. Burnout builds over time, and if you think you’re “getting better” and then don’t take the time to actually do that, you’ll end up exactly where you started — Feeling miserable and low-energy.
5 — Getting better…
Overall, I learned that it’s okay to take a break to get better. I have taken a few months off, gone to visit friends and family I hadn’t seen in years, and focused on what I want to do. I didn’t jump back into a stressful lifecycle straight away, because I knew that this break was needed in order for me to recover. The best thing is to find your balance on how to get better. It’s not an over-night process.
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The last few months of having a break have been wonderful, and very much needed. I know not everyone can take a break, but it’s important to listen to the signals your body puts out to avoid serious burnout and being forced to take a break or becoming ill. I feel like I don’t need to say this, but don’t forget to take care of yourself and spend time with friends and family. Take a vacation every once in a while and just enjoy the moment. There will always be work in the end, but your health and well-being are more important.
If you’re feeling burnout, or stressed, just know that you’re not alone. It’s okay to need to talk to someone, and it’s okay to need to take a break. Most importantly, if you feel like you’re experiencing these symptoms and are unsure where to turn to, I encourage you to talk to a professional.
External link:
https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/what-to-know-about-burnout
